• View
• Edit
• History
• Print

ItMakesMeWantToKill

You are on the archive wiki. The new wiki is here. Now, I know that fashions come and go, and that when in the midst of a fashion you think it's the coolest look ever and that old people are just sooo old and totally don't get it, but really. This fashion for wearing ones pants so low down on the hips that the top (and sometimes a lot more) of your underwear sticks out, is just going too far.

Usually it's the brightly-coloured-boxers (sometimes with obvious incriminating stains) sticking out of the top of whatever pant he's wearing (and how they're held up God alone knows). The worst I've seen has to be a large black man in jeans hanging so low that his stained tighty whities (those tight gay-ish cotton boxers) stuck out. And not just the name-brand top bit, but his whole ass. And he didn't even have the decency to wear a longish top. I could be maligning him uneccessarily, though. He could have lost weight recently and perhaps his pants are getting a little too big, but the lack of pulling them up speaks otherwise. I really really wish I had the balls to go up to these shameless miscreants and shout in their faces "PULL UP YOUR PANTS, ASSHOLE!!", or at least surreptitiously pull them up for them. Sigh.

This was my sheltered viewpoint until yesterday morning. Taking the train to work, I happened to glance over at the dude standing opposite me by the door. He had an interesting shirt on, and while trying to read it, my gaze followed the writing down. To hell, apparently. Where his shirt ended (not nearly low enough), there lay exposed his take on this "fashion". This poor individual obviously could afford neither boxers nor the tighter version, cos he was wearing your typical underpants, the bikini briefs kind. And his pants were pulled so low, you could see everything in front, including the wisps of pubic hair escaping the front of his package {eek}. I nearly died laughing. My god.

What next? Why even bother wearing pants at all? It's like a smorgasbord of ass-crack, dirty underwear and pubes on display for all to see. And it's not even just guys. Girls too, although admittedly it doesn't bother me as much, cos it's usually just the tops of the panties sticking out. So, here are my hints for anyone wanting to wantonly indulge in this form of public indecency:

1) The underwear - make sure it's loose and clean, please, and pulled up enough to cover the ass-crack of doom.
2) The t-shirt - long enough to cover the gap between t-shirt and low-slung pants, so that just a hint of unmentionables is glimpsed. 3) The pants - tight enough at the belt that you don't have to pull them up all the time, and rolled up at the bottom, so that you don't trip, fall on your overly-exposed ass and spoil the coolness of your "look".

But, most importantly of all, if you do choose to display your creative individuality with this sort of dress sense, do it far away frm me.

Comment: urge (by d@vid on 2005-02-22 14:56:26)

> or at least surreptitiously pull them up for them. Sigh.

don't you mean... wedgie?

Comment: Run, wigger, run. (by AndieMoore? on 2005-02-22 18:20:29)

There's nothing funnier than one of these running. It's like women running in long dress/skirts, they have to hold onto the back of their pants to stop them from falling.

Comment: Doin' it for the ladies (by LothrielPixie? on 2005-02-23 12:34:35)

I don't know about it being that much more visually acceptable for girls. You just have to take a wander around North Jozie of South London to realise that it is a crime against sanity to combine size 8, white, low-cut hipsters with an equally white g-string proudly positioned as high as it can go (speaking about wedgie...)

Oh, and when in a pool bar, aim to find a table well clear of any of the boxer sporting morons since that leaning action seems to have a adverse effect on the underpants vs crack-coverage ratio. The horror, the horror.

Comment: yeah! (by WombatBoy? on 2005-02-24 08:34:40)

I have a question about miniskirts right, most of them are now ugly looking and too short. It must be a testament to gullibility and stupidity, or something.
:-(