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SwingSock

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swingsock the game of kings

(well, the game of people who want his crown anyway)

swingsock is an ancient game played since the sock was invented. it is a game of cunning, stealth, strength, speed, wisdom, general athleticism, and big prizes. such nobel men as prisoners, army boys (see: full metal jacket), property redistributers, and pissed off badasses all play swingsock.
first thing you must know is why you should play. you play for prizes. people often carry prizes everyday and you never know what you'll win until the game is afoot (like a lucky dip of fun). some prizes include trophies, watches, jackets, nice full wallets, and other things people keep about their person while walking around the playing field. sometimes players play for less tangible prizes like revenge, respect, adreniline, or just for the hell of it. not much equipment is required, it's easy to obtain and cheap. all you need to play is a sock (preferably a nice thick one) and a suitable filling. well known players and experts have used bars of soap, a half-brick, small statues, paperweights, and of course the most famous: an orange. other contreversial, non-standard fillings include a bunch of coins, dice, week old sandwiches, and rats. although they may be effective (to varying degrees) these fillings are concidered tournament illegal and any records set with them are unnofficial.
other equipment that can be used is optional but some of the suggested items you may want are things like a fast pair of running shoes, a jacket with deep pockets, sweatbands, and maybe a pair of dark sunglasses. to start the game you need to decide on a suitable playing field. fields can be of any size and generally play will continue off-field once the game is nearining completion. good fields include train stations, universities, malls, back alleys in dodgy neighbourhoods, prisons, dorms, and many other. basically, where there are people there is a possibility of a game. now survey your field and take note of all possible entrances and exits and make sure to mark your prize carrier. prize carriers are people that walk around with prizes, but you must remember that not all prize carriers have a worthy prize so make sure you choose someone who looks like they might have an expensive prize hidden about their person. (note: sometimes your prize carrier is chosen for other reasons especially when playing for things like revenge/respect.)
by this stage you should already be kitted up and your filling should already be in your sock. now, without people seeing you and alerting your prize carrier, sneak up rapidly behind your prize carrier while redying your sock by swinging it around your head. there are many different styles for swinging the sock, some prefer to swing less and use more strength in a rapid strike, some prefer a good wind-up, some prefer to swing low, some swing high. practice and find your own unique style to fit both yourself, the situation, and your filling. now that you are behind your prize carrier the aim is to use the sock to render him ready for prize transferal. this is often accomplished with a well swung sock to the head (called a kiss or the kiss of a sock), dropping the prize carrier to the ground. further kisses may be neccessary to convince the prize carrier that you have won a prize.
once readied for prize transferal the prize carrier will have to be searched for the prize. some prize carriers carry multiple prizes and often prizes are hidden in pockets, bags, or even worn. always remember to be quick yet thorough at this point as the game can take a nasty turn at this point. collect all the prizes you can get/carry and prepare for the second part of swingsock: the securing of prizes. look around now (especially if people are screaming) and look for goalies. goalies are people who (after the initial kiss of sock) will try chase you down and take your prizes away. using a sock on the goalies is perfectly legal but it is not advised as genarally goalies move around in packs and tend to be a bit rough. to secure your prize you must escape the goalies and find a safe zone (such as your home, under a bridge, squashed into a locker, anywhere where goalies won't be able to find you) where you can truly admire your prize.
this can of course be played as a team game with multiple players taking on differing roles depending on the objective. sometimes all players will be swingers, sometimes players will be there to aid in the securing of the prize (like with a car). remember though, once you have played swingsock, goalies may continue to look for you long after you have secured your prizes especially if the prize carrier received too many kisses and there was too great an audience.

well those are the basics of swingsock, but the game can become far more advanced and complex with varying goals and playing fields. sometimes goalies will become a huge problem and sometimes they don't even factor into a game. remember, all you need is a sock and a filling and you can play anywhere.